Don’t put your pronouns in your email signature
Hey friend,
I’m guessing you’ve seen folks include their pronouns in their email signature, as well as social media bios. If nowhere else, you’ve seen my pronouns in my email signature and social media bio!
I love this practice. It normalizes sharing pronouns explicitly, instead of assuming what someone’s pronouns are based on how you perceive their gender. But it also carries additional meanings for gender diverse people. And while those meanings can and do vary from person to person, one really important meaning is this:
When you share your pronouns, you’re identifying yourself as an ally to trans, nonbinary, and gender non-conforming people. Thus…
Only put your pronouns in your email signature and bios when you’re ready to be an active, vocal ally to the gender diverse folx in your life.
When I see pronouns in a signature or a bio, I feel safer and more comfortable. To me, it signals “I see and support you, gender diverse friend!” I relax a little, much the same way I do when I see someone wearing a rainbow pin on their ID badge or a rainbow sticker on an office door.
It’s a great feeling! But it can backfire if the person signaling their allyship is not prepared to be act as an ally. Think about these scenarios:
Someone in your organization complains about respecting others’ pronouns and identity—how do you respond?
Someone confides in you that their pronouns are actually they/them, but they use binary pronouns (he or she) because they’re afraid of backlash or rejection—what would you say?
Someone tells you zir pronouns are neopronouns—what’s your response?
If you’re looking at these questions and feeling uncertain about your answers, I can help. Whether it’s with a workshop, a courageous conversation, or guiding your org through a deeper culture shift, I’m here for you.
What do you need to get your organization in sync with your signatures? Reply to this email to let me know!
Fondly,
Cate
PS Next Thursday, I’m joining my friend Ariana Lloyd of The Lloyd Collective to present about 3 Ways Every Therapy Practice Can Be Gender Inclusive at her monthly Workshop/Fundraiser event. I’d love for you to join! Keep an eye on my new instagram (@authentic.self.consulting) for more info, including how to sign up!